23
Jul
10

do as i say, not as i scream

"rebecca"

HOW COULD ANYONE SCREAM AT THIS SWEET FACE? she screamed.

Despite the fact that I have spent all summer home with three children, I have managed to earn my advanced degree. I majored in hypocrisy with a minor in irony. And I’m not talking about the alanis morissette fake type irony [see note], but the real thing. I’ve completed all my readings and coursework and had my final exam today. I passed!

Middle screaming at the top of his lungs: MMOOOOOOMMMMOOMMM!

Me speaking in a loud voice: Please come and find me if you need to talk to me!

Middle screaming at the top of his lungs: MOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!

Me speaking in a much louder voice: Come and find me, please!

Middle screaming at the top of his lungs: MMMMMMOOOOOOOOMM!

Me screaming at the top of my lungs: DON’T SCREAM AT ME!

Ta-da! A+++

[Note: have you ever noticed that what alanis is singing about so passionately isn’t really irony, but more like coincidence? All you can find is a knife when you really need a fork? I call that coincidence my friend.]

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now what’s that now?

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