02
Sep
10

and the award goes to…

Any event involving balloon creations and dry grass made a late entrance and is pretty much guaranteed the award next year

Recently, the award for the most stressful parental duty/activity was given out. This award, known as the PYHO (Pull Your Hair Outy) is coveted in the world of children’s actions meant to annoy their parents. The field was very competitive, but the finalists were:

Potty training a 3-year-old boy, with special guest situation Peeing of the Pants in front of the train table at the CARPETED Barnes and Noble: TWICE.

All Boy Summer Birthday party where said boys run around shirtless with blue frosting smeared on their chests, throwing basketballs into oncoming traffic and pouring lemonade down the slide (think Lord of the Flies without the literary significance).

Any situation involving playdoh!

Pushing a double stroller with two boys in it, both dragging the toes of their shoes on the wheel as it attempts to go around, causing the stroller weighing apx. 80 pounds to become harder to push, and also creating a very boy-satisfying farting shoe noise.

And your winner…

Trying to get three young children to fall asleep in a hotel room.

Applause. Applause. Applause.

Now, here comes “trying to get three young children to fall asleep in a hotel room” for his acceptance speech.

Incidently,  he’s clothed completely in white hotel grade sheets and wrapped in a stunningly shiny burgundy coverlet.

“Thank you. Thank you so much for this award. I also want to acknowledge those that were nominated with me, because really, we work as a team.

And to the children; I couldn’t have done this without your crabby, overtired, armpit fart making, bed hogging little selves. This award is really yours as much as it is mine.

And to the parents: may we meet again at a Holiday Inn sometime soon. You’ll know me by the glint in my eye, the uselessly flat pillows, and the sharp springs of my sofa bed. I’ll know you by the look of steely determination in your eye, the packages of Benadryl and the repeated renditions of “I’ve been Working on the Railroad” and “You are my Sunshine”.

Thank you again and may all your nights spent in hotels be stressful.”

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1 Response to “and the award goes to…”


  1. September 4, 2010 at 1:00 am

    Wow, your blog looks great!

    And halle-freakin-LOOO-yah about hotels.

    Thanks for putting me on your blogroll, gal!

    xo


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